A Day In The Life Of An Oblivious Ape.: Fuck you.

Okay, now that shops island-wide have started to open up, I've got beef with another societal group:

PEOPLE WHO BLAST MUSIC FROM THEIR PHONE / MP3 SPEAKERS IN PUBLIC BUSES.

You know what, fuck you. That's right, I'm looking at you noobs: dipshits fresh out of Secondary 3 who try to look cool but fail, poseurs with hair that looks like they put Viagra gel on them, etc. You get the fucking picture.

Not only are they a damn nuisance to the general public, they have HIDEOUS taste in music. But you know what, that's just my opinion. If you're 15 and still stuck on Avril Lavigne's When You're Gone and Apologize by Timbaland feat. One Republic, I'd say you're pretty washed up. And for you Cheena dickweeds out there, 'washed up' in the Ape's dictionary simply means 'fucked'.

You know what, I 'respect' your taste in music (and I say that with much distaste.) but you don't need to publicly advertise your love for passe artistes such as AVRIL.

"Hey, all you people whom I presume have no musical taste whatsoever! Listen to the type of songs I like! Isn't Shayne Ward so COOL? I know he's cool because I listen to him! I'm cool! Avril's cool too! Because I listen to her! Look at me play her songs on my phone! My speakers are so cool! Because they're MY speakers! Oh WOW!"

That just makes you an UBER NOOB. Because of that, both Shayne and Avril are probably vomiting blood in their high-end sinks right about now. And for that, you shall receive a commemorative plaque with the words 'Fuck You.' inscribed on them. You're welcome.

Oh yeah, I'd like to extend some kudos to the creators of Ctrl-Alt-Delete, a daily comic strip that tells the story of your average video-game geeks Lucas and Ethan, and the people around them. It was this comic strip that taught me the difference between 'Newb' and 'Noob'.

(That's right, you Maple-lovers, there IS a difference.)

A 'Newb' is a gamer who genuinely is unsure about a certain aspect of a game, and is not afraid to admit so. With careful guidance and cultivation, a 'Newb' will grow to become an extraordinary gamer.

A 'Noob' is a plain fucker who acts like he knows everything in the game. Face it, you don't. So stop acting like it. You're a noob; that's insult enough.

Go ahead and check out the Ctrl-Alt-Del strip here:

Ctrl-Alt-Del